Month September 2022

Giant Fuyu from Turtle Pie Co

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Giant Fuyu from Turtle Pie Co via Catalyst Downtown Long Beach on 7/22/2022. THC tested out to 28.95%. This was about $35 out the door with Catalyst’s #weedforthepeople discount, normally it goes for $75 out the door. The Turtlepie/GreenDawg/BluePrint gang made their way down to Catalyst Long Beach for a meet and greet and to run a killer promo with Catalyst. They were a solid group of folks and I had a great time chatting them up. I asked @barneyhastheblueprint out of flavors Catalyst had in stock which one he would recommend, and without hesitation he said “Giant Fuyu”, so I decided to roll with it and see what’s good.

The surface of these semi-dense mini-trident shaped buds are a patchwork of tea and emerald greens that rapidly shift into deep rich aubergines, coupled with sporadic bursts of ginger orange pistils snaking their way across the budscape in small spurts, all of which is heavily frosted over in a vision obscuring blizzard of mellow yellow triches. 

The nose out of the jar is extremely fruity sweet, but has these grungy and minty aspects as well, which when taken together gives the scent a bit of a sweet yet spiced quality. I admit, I have never smelled a fuyu persimmon before so I have no basis for comparison when it comes to this experience, but I will say that there’s something in this scent profile that is mildly reminiscent of the shell of a Peruvian granadilla which is one of my favorite foreign fruits. Breaking open a bud the sweetness takes it up a notch, it’s a bit difficult to describe, but essentially it feels like the sugariness goes up an octave and maintains that higher pitch while that natural grungy fruit element remains firmly present, which pushes that mint towards the background. It almost comes off like a honeydew with a grungy and musty tinge. Busting it down by hand, my fingers stay with that sweet minty honeydew smell, whereas the grinds have more of a waxy fruit sweetness. It comes off similar to a melon hi-chew with a light minty gas edge. 

The dry pull on the joint has this fruity sweetness with a table sugar touch that dug up an ancient memory for me. When I was in 4th grade or so we’d walk by this patch of flowers on the way back from the bus stop, pick them and suck the ends of them and they tasted sweet in this exact same way. We called them honeysuckles but that looks to be incorrect as I’ve searched around on google, and I think they were morning glory’s from what I’m seeing, but no one seems to talk about sucking on the ends of them so I’m not entirely sure. It could just be a weird thing us group of 4th graders just started doing. In any case, it has a very pleasant near honey sweet taste. 

On the inhale from the bong I get a slightly acrid yet grungy sweet sensation, whereas the inhale on the joint has a musty dough like sweetness, the “sour” aspect of the dough comes through as well, signed off by a minty lilt. The exhale on the bong hits with a musty sweet semi-fruity floral that had occasional inconsistent echoes of savory bbq, whereas the joint had a deep musty fruit that was enveloped by this gassy exterior, which at times dipped into this grape-ish brandywine like flavor. My notes say that “the mustiness and sweetness seem to alternate as if they are helicopter kicking my tongue on the way out” and that the fruitiness lingered for a good few minutes afterward, with that aftertaste coming off exactly the same way as if I had eaten a melon hi-chew just moments ago. Cross checking the flavor on my GhostVapes MV1 at the one available temp I have left, I get a fruity sweet inhale with a mint pine backing, whereas the exhale comes off as pure piney floral. 

The headchange comes on quickly and has a bit of get up and go initially and some solid forehead pressure. Mentally I didn’t feel any worse for wear, I was fully functional and able to focus with no issue, and it put me in a positive state of mind so I was able to tackle tasks I’d been putting off with a fresh perspective and a better attitude. It mellows out a bit later and comes with a very chill vibe that lasts a ridiculously long time. As I write this, I smoked the last bowl of the batch about 3 hours ago, and I’m still feeling as if I smoked a bowl of average herb just a few minutes ago, so that’s some really impressive staying power. 

All and all I really enjoyed this batch of Giant Fuyu, it’s some extremely well grown herb, the nose translated near perfectly to the taste, and the effect managed to stay with me for hours. Without a doubt I’d pick this up again in a heartbeat at the rate it went for that night with Catalyst’s #weedforthepeople discount in place. I still can’t get over that ticket and I’m kicking myself for not picking up a couple more jars. At the normal rate I’d be a bit more hesitant as there’s just so much potential within that bracket, but I’d say Giant Fuyu definitely earns that spot on that top shelf, and if not for the deal I would have made my way to picking it eventually and I would have been equally satisfied. My wallet however would have been a bit sadder heading out the dispensary door. Great job on this one Turtle Pie Team, I’m definitely looking forward to getting more of your stuff up on the page, keep up the great work! 

Duck Sauce from EastSide Eggroll and Ted’s Budz

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(Heavy) Duck Sauce from EastSide Eggroll and Ted’s Budz via Catalyst Downtown Long Beach on 7/21/2022. THC tested out to 35%. Normally goes for $69 out the door at Catalyst. This batch of Duck Sauce had just hit the market, and my buddy @inspector_of_all was looking to get his hands on a bag, but it was selling out left and right at every store it landed. Not being one to miss a hype train, I saw a fresh drop hit the menu at Catalyst Downtown Long Beach, so I put in an online order for two of them and was able to virtually secure the bag for us both.

Speaking of the bag, this is the first time I’ve ever come across a clear mylar and I have to say I dig it. Being able to see the nugs in a bag before you walk out of the shop with it is a nice change of pace. The surface is an amalgam of forest, sage, fern, moss and even the occasional speck of Sacramento green which appears so dark at points it nearly comes across as midnight blue. Even the inconspicuous pistils, while mostly a dark twine color, appear olive green at times and nearly go unnoticed as they mesh with the background, especially when juxtaposed against an abundance of glittering egg cream colored triches that cram themselves into any available space. 

The nose out of the bag is very candy-like up top, the Zkittlez really comes through at first, but it also has a very fresh vaporous backing that becomes more and more prominent the longer you try to work through the other scents. It’s a bit of a hostile nostril take over. Breaking open the bud you get a sense for its mild density, it’s not super fluffy but has a good give to the squeeze. The nose gets slightly brighter but is essentially the same as the bag, it has that candy sweetness trying to take the dominant spot but the vaporousness is just holding it down at every turn. It does seem to have a more lemony lilt, but there’s a touch of orange as well, so it’s overall very citrusy. Busting it down by hand leaves a strong presence of candy sweet vapor on the fingertips, while the grinds themselves bring the scent into its final form and it becomes the very definition of fruity candy gas. The harmony in the fruity candy scent feels like it cascades across my sense of smell, unfolding like an accordion, bringing that fuel and a slightly distant perfume like floral as well. I really love this scent and if I could somehow move into it and live there I would. 

The dry pull comes with a very light candy sweetness, but it was difficult to get a solid pull as I left the material chunkier than usual, and I was getting a bit of a mummified look on the joint before lighting it. The inhale on the joint comes with a sugar sweet citrus, with an emphasis on that sugary aspect, while the bong comes with an extremely light lemon lime that was not consistent and often read as non-descript. The exhale on the joint comes with a tasty candy gas that widens out into a nice orange-like finish with just a touch of lime, whereas the bong comes through with a musty sweet cream and a hint of chalk. The fruitiness does make its way through on the bong occasionally, but it’s as if it’s riding sidecar, and the cream is the one laying on the gas from the driver’s saddle. 

The headchange is unfortunately the least distinctive aspect of this batch. Don’t get me wrong, it’s solid, it’s just that there’s very little wow factor involved in the effect. Mentally I felt present, and there was a noticeable calm that washed over me as my anxiety faded ever so slightly, but that anxiety still remained within mental arms reach. It saps motivation in a way that made me feel annoyed if I had to deal with any tasks to which I wasn’t looking forward to tackling. It’s the type of herb that’s very sigh inducing as dealing with life became a chore in itself. I also found myself making consistently making dumb little mistakes, like putting my keys away in the wrong place, which added to that annoyance upon correcting those mistakes. Physically I felt a slight decrease in energy but that’s about it, strong enough to make me want to kick back on the couch, but not to the point where I felt in danger of knocking out.

All in all, I really liked everything about this Duck Sauce outside of the slightly unremarkable buzz. It checks nearly all the boxes and I would be down to give another batch a shot. If I could find it at a slightly more affordable ticket I’d jump in again without hesitation, but at it’s current rate, there is just too much out there piquing my curiosity to double dip at the moment. This was a solid introduction to EastSide Eggroll and the Ted’s Budz line up and I’ll definitely get into more of their offerings asap.

Wendy from Squints

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Wendy from Squints and Foreign Genetics via From the Earth on 7/8/2022. THC tested out to 23.8% on the first batch. Initially purchased for $35 because of some awesome delivery deal, when I went back to the physical store I still ended up getting it on sale, but for a pricier $55 out the door. After hearing Squints talk about Wendy on the @firstsmokeoftheday podcast I felt compelled to do a hype check and I started searching around for a bag in my area. I came across a pretty killer delivery deal at From the Earth so I hit that order button without delay. 

These buds have very little give to the squeeze, so they would probably fare ok in the mylar on their own, but I love how their integrity is preserved with the help of a small plastic tray. The surface of the buds is a mix of sage and forest greens, with abundant patches of deep rich aubergine that dip into midnight blue, and even appear near vantablack at points. Spiced orange pistils tightly grip the budscape while a blizzard of white triches obscures the view of them so heavily they nearly go unnoticed on some nugs. 

The nose out of the bag hit me like a peppermint milkshake at first. There’s a very sweet candy aspect but there’s also this chalky necco wafer element with a touch of cream which is all enrobed in a minty vaporiousness. Breaking open a bud that vaporiousness really takes it up a notch and approaches Vick’s VapoRub levels of stinging the nostril but that candy chalky sweetness is still making its presence known along with a sweet musty quality. Busting it down by hand, my fingers smell of a powerful greasy must couped with gas, while the grinds themselves come with a sweet chalky fuel and a light fruity underpinning. Overall it’s very sweet but that eucalyptus-like gas aspect is truly overwhelming and makes the rest of the scents difficult to pin down. 

The dry pull on the joint brings a strong chalky sweetness with a minty gas edge while a taste reminiscent of a sugar cube quickly slaps the taste buds. The inhale on the joint is sugar sweet to the point it tastes vaguely like toasted marshmallows with a hint of vapor, whereas the bong has a vague musty mint-like zing. The exhale on the joint presents a musty gas with a touch of sweetness, whereas the sweetness hits hard uptop on the bong, and then quickly winds down into a flat chalkiness. Cross checking the flavor on my neutered Ghost Vapes MV1, at the only available temp, it comes with a strong mint pine combo on the inhale and comes out with a strong pinesol sensation that leaves your tongue coated in pine for a couple minutes afterward.  

The headchange is fantastic. It comes on quickly and brings a happy go lucky vibe that can really turn your frown upside down. There are two times I can distinctly remember absolutely losing my shit in a giggle fit over some genuinely funny circumstances, but the way with which I could not control my laughter in those moments is what sticks out the most. While this didn’t happen every single time I smoked Wendy, I definitely have to mention it, as the level to which I could not compose myself was servere and not something I can recollect happening with any other strain in the past few years. This feel good aspect does not lend itself to staying on task though, and it will bring on a strong case of the IDGAFs if you’ve got any chores you’re looking to tackle, but are not exactly looking forward to doing. I’d say your best bet is to save this smoke for days where you don’t have a strict itinerary and the only thing on your agenda is going with the flow. No matter what you get it up to, you’ll find it difficult to have a bad time with Wendy by your side. 

This is one of the rare instances where I double dipped before finishing up the review as I enjoyed the smoke that much. I have to admit, I had a bit of a sticker shock on that second batch purchase, but it was still worth it. Excellent job on this one Squints and Foreign Genetics, looking forward to getting into more of your library and seeing how other strains hold up in comparison, keep up the great work.