Zkittlez grown by Candito in collaboration with Gulf Coast, acquired on 10/16/2023. No Testing info available as it’s from the traditional market. This was gifted to me but I did spot it on OC Best Meds Website for $160 for the 7g jar. Over the past few years, I’ve been fortunate enough to have Gulf Coast keep me in mind when he comes across new heat that he thinks should be on my radar. So when he said he had a living soil grown Z collab with Candito, from “the original cut of Z”, and he wanted me to try it, there was no way I could say no. 

To put it plainly, Z is typically fairly ugly, and while this batch has all the hallmarks of a classic Z, it also manages to tamp down some of those less than desirable aspects one would see in an “average” iteration. The surface of these bulbous yet spikey nugs are mostly a shade of mint green that strike the eye with a soft glow. It’s hard to visually discern if that hue is due to the color of the calyx or to the daunting amount of brilliantly shining white and egg cream triches flooding the entirety of the nugscape. In the spots where the triches are less prevalent, there’s an abundance of deep forest green sugar leaves that fill out the underskirt of every nug, while tangerine pistils burst out of every available crevice and crackle across the canopies like lightning, eventually finding their natural end. 

The nose out of the jar uptop is a unique sweet lemon lime scent with an effervescent quality. It smells like something that you’d get at a fancy bar if you asked the mixologist for their best attempt at a handcrafted sprite. The longer I leave my nose in the jar, the more that classic musty orange scent I’m accustomed to smelling from Z comes through. Busting open a bud, that lemon lime characteristic brightens up and left my nostrils with a slight acidic sting, and even had echoes of a soap/cilantro as well. Attempts to grind this by hand did not go well, it was too dense and too fresh, it left my fingers sticky, defeated, and reeking of lemony goodness. After running it through the shredder, the grinds remain steadfast in that bubbly lemon lime but also has an overarching sweet chalky scent as well. 

The dry pull on the J comes through with that citrus party as well, although the sugar sweetness takes it up a notch, giving it overall light lime lifesaver vibes, to the point it even leaves a light yet noticeable sweet lime taste on the tongue. The inhale on the J matches the dry pull leaving that limonene dancin’ on your taste buds, whereas the experience on the bong is the same, just slightly less aggressive with its presence. The exhale on the bong comes across with a light sweet lime, sort of like the ghost of a lime otter pop, supported by a musty orange backing, whereas the flavor on the joint 100% lines up with how the grinds smell. A delicious mix of sugar, lemon and lime. I’m pretty sure this is the closest I’ve ever felt to “smoking a sprite” in my joint consuming history.  

The headchange comes on quick and smacks like a MACK truck. Mentally, I felt launched into an extraordinary level of derp that caught me completely off guard. I spent a full day with it, and it had me lost in the sauce most times to the point I became much more cautious about the amount I was smoking in a given sesh. Physically, while it doesn’t make you sleepy right away, it has an ability to take the wind out of your sails with near immediacy. In my accelerated attempts to write this review while the sample was fresh, I found myself just now having to take a final rip to flush out my tasting notes, and I went from feeling the power of two cups of coffee and the passion of a new day helping me mash the gas on this write up, to having my sense of momentum completely obliterated. Only by marshalling all the willpower I could muster did I successfully manage to make it through the canna-induced quicksand slowly enveloping my body and mind and make it through the end of this review. For the most part I’d consider Z to be an all day sort of smoke, and I suppose I can say the same about this smoke as well, however I’d recommend having nothing of consequence on your agenda for the day, as the potential need for a post lunch nap is indeed strong with this one. 

If you couldn’t tell by all of that, I really liked this batch of Zkittlez, and while I can’t say I could easily afford it, if you’re a fan of Z in general I think you’ll be highly satisfied with this batch. Great work on this one Candito and Gulf Coast, if this is a sign of the quality of the future work coming our way from this collab, I can’t wait to see what y’all put out next!

Triple Layer Z from Diamond Fire on 3/25/2023. I have no idea what this goes for as it’s from the traditional market and it was gifted to me, but check with your local market and let me know what you find out there, I’m very curious.

A few months back, I had the pleasure of finally linking up with Diamond Fire, after what felt like years of chatting it up online. He was generous enough to gift me a few samples, one of which was this Triple Layer Z. 

The surface of these semi-dense beefed out buds displays a menagerie of mint, sea-foam, and forest greens juxtaposed with a deep rich aubergine that nearly dips into pitch black at points, coupled with orange marmalade pistils and a coating of trichs so ridiculously thick it looks like it was applied along the ridge lines with a piping bag. Thanks to Will down at Curated Cannabis, I had the opportunity to look at this batch under a camera with a microscopic zoom, and it was really impressive to see how intact and pristinely persevered the trichomes were. I had some other traditional market flower with me that smoked really well, but looked absolutely awful under magnification, so I really have to give Diamond Fire props for how well preserved this flower is post-cure. 

The nose out of the jar is a tremendously gassy mint mixed with a fresh pine and a faint nutty dough-like underpinning. Busting open a nug, a fruity sweet quality claws it’s way through the cloud of vaporous mint, it’s warm and sugary but hard to pin down. It’s near an orange marmalade, but lacks any sort of citrus zing whatsoever, yet it’s blasting sweetness through and through. Grinding it down by hand, that ever present minty gas joins forces with that powerful sweetness, while the fruitiness almost disappears entirely, leaving behind only a tell tale lemon scent as its representative. There’s also this cleaner-esque quality that pops in and out of the profile, as well as some wood glue, and an echo of distant vinegar. 

The dry pull on the joint came through with a sweet chalky gas and a faint reminder of that lemon as well. The inhale on the bong left a gassy like singe on the tongue, whereas the joint was lighter on the gas, and brought with it a floral element as well. The exhale on the bong is a heavy musty gas that finishes with a minty zing that lights up the tongue, and even has light passion fruit vibes on occasion, whereas the joint comes across very sweet, yet provides rich gassy tones as well. 

The headchange comes on quick and left me thoroughly melted on first smoke. I remember messaging someone and told them I felt nearly drunk, but in a really hazy warm way that was extra enjoyable. Physically there’s a nice tingle that runs down the base of the neck and into the shoulders, it’s the kind of herb that makes you do a double take on how good it feels to take a minute and stretch, it put the thought in my head of “this must by why people smoke and do yoga”. The effect is long lasting, but I’d say after about 30 minutes or so I found myself wanting to smoke more, but when I tried to do anything that required even a quarter of my brain power I realized I didn’t really “need” to, and I stayed that way for a few hours. 

All in all, if you couldn’t tell already, I really loved this batch of Triple Layer Z. It checked off every single one of the boxes in my opinion, and if I could go to a store and pick up a fresh batch today I absolutely would. The fact it’s achieved repeat buy status speaks volumes, it’s something I rarely am willing to do these days, but I’d jump on this again in a heart beat. Excellent work Diamond Fire!

Pika Blu Chew from Babybuckettt and 12 Alarm Fire (distro’d by Ted’s Budz) via @buttersantaana on 3/12/2023. Huge shout out to The Highly Rated Show and skeemxcream7 for making it happen. THC tested out to 35%. Purchased for $65 out the door with the 20% happy hour discount.  Back in March skeemxcream7 put this batch of Pika Blu Chew on my radar and told me if I could find a bag he’d handle the expense of the review. Never one to turn down a generous offer, I jumped on it and located a bag at Butter Santa Ana. 

I’ll start with pretty much the only bad news about this batch: the contents of this bag were essentially popcorn mixed with a couple of small buds. Not a great showing for a mylar that runs about $80 retail. The surface of these bitsy buds were a patchwork of deep indigo coupled with kelly and fern greens, sporadic petite arcs of copper brown pistils, and salted over heavily with white and muted egg cream colored triches. 

The nose out of the bag was very gelato-like up top. It presented as a sweet cream with a fruity lean that was hard to put my finger on, but it landed somewhere on a venn diagram between mango, peach and even pineapple, with a sort of waxy quality kicking around as well.  Busting open one of the largest buds I could find, I noted a burst of freshness, as well as the sweetness amping up in a particularly table sugar-esque way, pushing that fruit to the background slightly. Breaking it down by hand, my fingers were left with a sharp sweet freshness with a chalky finish, while the grinds themselves were a cacophony of sweet piney-mint and sweet fruit. The richness of the fruit played off of the brisk fresh aspect, and when taken all together, resulted in an overall beautiful candy like scent.

The dry pull on the joint came with a necco wafer-like chalky sweetness with that fresh quality fleshing out the background, and just a hint of fruitiness underneath. The inhale on the joint was sugar sweet from moment one, whereas the bong was much more nondescript. It was essentially just musty, although occasionally there would be a faint “wasabi” like bite, but it wasn’t consistent. The exhale on the bong was also lacking definition, there’s a mustiness that leaves a slight freshness on the tongue, but that too is inconsistent. The exhale on the joint also comes with a mustiness, albeit a more robust one, that also has a faint fruit quality hanging out in the wings. My GhostVapes MV1 is still out of commission for the time being but my guess would be that this would read heavy on the pine at low temps. 

The real prize of this strain is the headchange. Even one small bowl will leave you fairly smacked. Physically, there was an overall mild heavy feeling when it came to my limbs, and that seemed to increase slightly over time. Mentally, I kept losing the thread and making dumb mistakes here and there. I went to pack another bowl when there was already one packed. I went to check the mail and got a package, which was enough of a distraction to cause me to leave my PO Box keys hanging out of my mailbox as I went back to my apartment completely unaware. Luckily I realized what I’d done shortly thereafter and managed to recover the keys. When I was smoking the joint and taking notes, I had a few moments where I absolutely forgot that was my goal and just got lost in my phone. This one definitely threw me for a loop and ended up being a real mind eraser, but it also had a DGAF quality that allowed me to not care and just enjoy the ride. 

In the end, I have some really conflicting feelings about my experience with this bag. I admit when I first smelled it, I figured it was just another gelato in a cool mylar, but the effect really won me over here. Even though it absolutely sucks to get a high ticket bag with popcorn, and the smoke experience itself was not anything to write home about, but this batch of Pika Blu Chew absolutely smashed me in a way that was so enjoyable I went to grab another bag, and was hella bummed that by the time I tried, Butter had completely sold out. I would definitely pick this one up again if I could find it for $60ish as I did the first time, but at the $80+ it would have me thinking twice, especially knowing I might be taking a gamble on getting another bag of popcorn. Great shit though BabyBuckettt, would love to try out some “bigs” and see if the effect/smoke is even better, keep up the solid work. 

OG Kush from Elephants Growth via North County Terps on 12/18/2022. This has been up on the Patreon for a bit, and while this was acquired way back in December, the notes were compiled shortly thereafter when the batch was as close to fresh as possible. No testing info available as it’s traditional market. This eighth was $150, and while I have heard of people letting them go for around $130, it’s still a pretty decent sized price tag. After what felt like years of hearing the hype revolving around Elephants Growth OG, I finally managed to get my hands on some (huge thanks to North County Terps for making it happen!). For the uninitiated, this particular OG is known to be one of the most expensive flowers in the traditional market space, which often makes it the subject of debate amongst connoisseurs when it comes to what defines a reasonable spend on a single ounce of small batch cannabis. 

These fluffy trident-esque buds are thoroughly green, yet cover the entire spectrum of the color, ranging from the light end of tea and seafoam greens all the way to the depths of pine and sacramento greens, contrasted against numerous sporadic spindly rusty orange-brown pistils wildly weaving throughout the budscape, all of which is fully drenched in an impressive eye widening deluge of fully formed paper white triches. 

The nose out of the bag is very standard issue OG, it was actually a bit fainter than I’d expected so I jarred it up for a few days in hopes of capturing some of that off gassing to drill into the bouquet a bit more, but it remained a light sweet herbaceous freshness with a distant hint of lemon water. On breaking open a bud, the fresh herbaceousness shifted into more of a gassy mint, with that timid lemon quality still hanging out in the corner, which culminated into a very familiar OG scent. Busting it down by hand, my fingertips were left absolutely stained with that same scent, coated in a gnarly triche grime, while the grinds themselves smelled strongly of pine-sol with a lemony kick. 

The dry pull brings a sugary sweet floral that lingers on the palate, almost as if it infects the saliva around the tongue with a light version of that sweetness. That same sweet floral is consistent on the inhale from both the bong and the joint, with the former occasionally presenting a gassy undertone. The exhale however differs, with the joint producing a very light semi-sweet musty floral with a hint of spice, whereas the bong came with a musty cream combined with a very light floral sweetness and the occasional reminder of gas. My flower vape is still out of commission but my assumption, given the experience with the smoke, is that it would read heavy on the pine notes at lower temps. 

The headchange comes on quickly and has a bit of a pick me up to it. It’s the kind of herb that makes me stand up after I take a hit, but I’m not exactly sure why I’m standing up, the body just feels like it has to move in that moment so I comply before I even fully comprehend what I’m doing. Mentally I felt overall cognizant, I didn’t have any issues getting lost mid-thought nor did I space out much, it was very easy to stay on task and in the moment. Physically there was a slight ASMR-ish tingle in the shoulders that ran to the base of my neck, a bit of pressure behind the eyes, and a minor headband effect that sat right on top of that. It was a solid experience for sure, but one that’s familiar and none too unique, however it’s very satisfactory and scratches an itch out the gate that a lot of herb misses the mark on these days. 

OG Kush has an unusual place in its ubiquity, it’s sort of everywhere and grown at all scales and levels of care, and as a result the consumer experience with it can be extremely varied. It’s akin to fried rice at any given Asian restaurant. The fried rice at Benihana for example is pretty damn tasty and it’s been really consistent on my visits there over the years, but when it comes to Panda Express it’s hit or miss, sometimes there’s egg and sometimes there isn’t, sometimes it’s dry and inedible. Of course Mom and Pop’s are probably going to do it best, but you have to put time into finding those small batch gems, as small scale doesn’t always mean top tier. Surprisingly, the best fried rice I’ve ever had in my entire life came out of a corner market with a small kitchen attached run by a husband/wife team, he manned the store and she manned the grill, and in addition to the rice they had a variety of grease pit style foods made to appeal to drunk college kids as it was nestled in the neighborhood right behind UCR, and was the only outside source of food in walking distance. It unfortunately closed long ago but I still think about that fried rice on occasion. The ingredients were standard, rice, onions, carrots, egg, spices, but it was the precise amount of all of those, put together and cooked in the exact right way, that just made it absolutely jaw droppingly delicious and I have never come across a fried rice quite like it since. 

The reason I took you, dear reader, on that stroll with me down memory lane was to say this. I’d probably pay anything to get another plate of that liquor store fried rice. It holds a nostalgic place in my memory that makes it nearly priceless to me, and probably me alone. When it comes to Elephant’s Growth OG, others could have had a similar experience like I did with that fried rice, and in that respect, the ticket is of no consequence to them. I had a great run with this OG, it’s obviously well grown and meticulously cared for at every stage, and with it being traditional market, a lucky consumer can get their hands on it before some of the more nuanced volatile terps off gas leading to a powerful experience. However, when contrasted with readily available OG’s on the recreational market and respective rates for them, I can’t say I would have a reason to double dip on this. In the end I’m all about the bang for the buck, and subjectively speaking, there’s really almost not enough bang possible for the buck typically associated with EG OG. $150 an 8th or more than 1k a zip is a lot. That’s definitely not a knock on the quality here, it’s just that I’m not the right consumer for it, just as I’m not the right consumer for those BWDs from MSCHF. While people may feel comfortable putting out the dough they do for those, I don’t see the value in it personally, and I’m happy to stick to my Brooks Beasts as they are high quality and work really well for me, and come in a ticket I can comfortably afford.  

Ghost C@#&! from Royal Key Organics via @catalyst_dtlb on 12/24/2022. THC tested out to 30%. Normally this goes for $60-ish after tax but I was able to get it for $30 with the Kushmas 50% off sale. The morning of Christmas Eve I found myself pouring over Catalyst Downtown Long Beach’s menu in preparation for the best sale of the year (Kushmas!), and while Royal Key was already on my radar, this Ghost C@#&! stood out to me for the weird name alone. There’s a lot of fun things you can guess that obscured word might be but it turns out the answer is pretty straight forward, it’s Candy, which apparently is one of a few words according to state law you can’t use on California Cannabis packaging.

The surface of these dense buds are mostly a mix of tea and persian greens with sporadic patches of rich aubergine, coupled with flares of ubiquitous apricot pistils busting out in all directions, awash in a glistening sea of white and egg cream colored triches.

The nose out of the jar is a semi sweet cream that smells very MAC “adjacent”, there’s also a hint of nutmeg-esque spice, and a solid musty underpinning to it all. The first time I broke open a bud, for a millisecond, it smelled nearly like I’d just opened a bag of Golden Crisp, so much so in that moment I quietly sang that old familiar jingle “can’t get enough of that Golden Crisp” to myself. While in subsequent sniffs, it still retained that cereal like vibe, there’s a solid pine quality in the mix as well, accompanied by a musty creamy gas filling out the back end. Breaking it down by hand my fingers were left with a scent of light cream and distant pine-sol , while the grinds themselves still have that cereal quality coupled with a fruity scent that was difficult to pull apart. At first it hit me almost like an artificial cherry, but as I dug in, I got some mango and berry-ish components too, and even a touch of banana, all wrapped up in a pine-like freshness. It’s very complex, and even in that sprawling description, I’m not sure I really did it justice. 

The dry pull on the J comes with a honeysuckle sweet freshness uptop that takes a quick acrid turn to more of a general sweet floral. It was a familiar flavor to me being half Peruvian, it tastes very similar to Ambrosoli de Chicha that are abundant down there, which I realize may not be informative to non-Peruvians, but I can’t think of a more widespread item that has the same exact flavor. The inhale on the joint comes with a floral freshness that leans into pine territory, where the bong is similar but also brings a doughy must along with it. The exhale on the joint presents as a creamy floral with a tinge of an acrid electric (tongue on a 9volt) lilt, and a chemical pine backing, whereas the bong comes with a musty dough interwoven with deep vaporous tones, and that same electric/metallic quality echoing the distance.

The headchange comes on quickly and with a satisfying thwack. Physically there’s a pressure that settles in right on top of the eyes, as well as some weight that pushes down on the shoulders, which didn’t make me seek a seat immediately, but did encourage an easily observed laziness in my stance and gait. Mentally I felt relaxed but fairly cognizant, I was able to think clearly and strategically about the day’s tasks ahead of me and plan accordingly. Although I ought mention there was this hazy IDGAF goblin hanging out in the background of my thoughts, and if I were so inclined to give in, I could see myself just hanging out, smoking more, and marathoning the rest of The Afterparty to get through it before my Apple TV+ trial runs out. 

All and all I really liked this Ghost Candy from Royal Key, which is really not surprising, as I’ve had nothing but solid experiences with everything I’ve gotten from them so far. While I picked this up partly due to the killer deal I was able to get on it at Catalyst’s Kushmas, for the caliber of smoke, I think $60 after tax is an extremely reasonable price for top shelf. While I’m not exactly chomping at the bit to get my hands on more ASAP, I could see myself picking it up again if I came across it and were in the mood for a rainy day type smoke as I think it’s well suited to staying in, and in So. Cal we’ve no shortage of rain lately, so I might find myself re-upping sooner than later. Great job on this one Royal Key, keep up the solid work!